Turning 50 – reflecting on five decades part 2

5/18/26 – Turning 50 – reflecting on five decades part 2

In the last post I started sharing the first two decades of my life including historical moments, leadership and professional development happenings, and other highlights of life. This post continues the story, moving into the next two decades.

1996-2005

As I turned 20, we were a few years away from what the world thought was going to be a major global crisis: Y2K. We thought computers were going to freak out and the world was going to lose the ability to function due to our reliance on technology. Thankfully, it didn’t. Mariah Carey topped the charts that birthday with “Always Be My Baby”, Dolly the sheep emerged as the first cloned mammal, and the summer Olympics were just a few months away in Atlanta, Georgia. Email got its start with the launch of Hotmail (how many of you had an account?), Wikipedia (I still use this to look up information), and YouTube (one of my guilty pleasures!). This decade also brought tragedy with the U.S. Embassy bombings in Kenya and Tanzania, the bombing at the Olympic Park during the summer Olympics, the Space Shuttle Columbia disaster, Hurricane Katrina, the 9/11 attacks which brought the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, and the deaths of Tupac Shakur and Princess Diana.

Leadership development during this time introduced many of us to the concept of emotional intelligence with books like Emotional Intelligence: Why it Can Matter More than IQ by Daniel Goleman. Spencer Johnson’s Who Moved My Cheese, the popular story that tells us how to adapt to change (there’s a kid’s version that I need to get for my son!), and Kerry Patterson et al.’s Crucial Conversations that guides leaders on how to effectively communicate to people in high stakes scenarios. Leaders during the decade included U.S. Presidents Bill Clinton and George W. Bush, UK Prime Minister Tony Blair, and Vladimir Putin in his first time of serving as the President of Russia. During these years, I continued to develop as a leader through my time as a youth group leader at a local church. That role brought valuable lessons about delegating and planning and discovering that youth ministry was not meant for me. It was also in these years that a few call center jobs laid the foundation that sparked my interest in training.

2006-2015

When I turned 30, Daniel Powter’s “Bad Day,” which became the elimination song on American Idol that year, was the number one song on the radio. This decade of my life brought the beginnings of Twitter (now X, though I still remember how we used to “tweet”), the first iPhone (now at version 17!), and the creation of Bitcoin (I had no idea that this even existed back then!). We were not without hard times with the “Great Recession,” the BP Deep Horizon oil spill, the Boston Marathon bombing, and a tsunami in Japan. I got married in this decade and decided to further my education through the Master of Training and Development program at Oakland University. While studying, I made great connections and friendships with many I still  keep in touch with. One is now a colleague of mine where I work, and another ended up becoming my realtor.

Leadership development during this time brought Susan Cain’s Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking (I recently read this book and as a fellow introvert resonated with many of the themes she shared), Charles Duhigg’s The Power of Habit, Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In, and Brene’ Brown’s Daring Greatly. These books challenged readers to better understand the value of introverted leaders, consider the science to help us make good habits and break the ones that hold us back, encourage women to continue pursuing leadership, and that it’s ok vulnerable. Leaders during that time included U.S. Presidents George W. Bush as continued his first term and served a second, Barack Obama as the first African American President, and Angela Merkel as the Chancellor of Germany notably leading the largest European economy through the financial crisis of 2008.

During these years I officially started my career in learning and development, moving into a trainer role at the call center I was working at. It was there that I discovered the ADDIE model for developing training and gained support and insights from other professionals that eventually led to me working for the company I’m still at today. The MTD program I previously mentioned included classes that taught me about developing teams, submitting requests for proposals, various leadership styles, and the principles of instructional design. I served on my first board, supporting a professional group tied to our grad school program and helped planned meetings and events for students to gain additional education and networking opportunities in the learning and development field. I also joined my company’s chapter of the National Management Association, first attending meetings then moving on to write articles for our newsletter and chairing a committee. Little did I know then where that would take me in the next decade of my life.   

Next time, I’ll share the last part of my five decades on earth with more history and experiences. What memories do you have from these ten years? How did you grow professionally during this time? I’d love to hear about it!

Turning 50 – reflecting on five decades part 1

Yesterday, I hit a major milestone. I’ve now been on this earth for five decades. Looking back as I’ve approached this date, so much has happened that brings different kinds of memories. For the next several posts, I have decided to share what has happened in the world from a history and leadership perspective in the last 50 years as well as insights from my own life and development journey. To start, I’ll share about the first twenty years.

1976-1985

I was born the year of America’s bicentennial, so that was big news in the months following my birth. The number one song the day I was born was “Welcome Back” by John Sebastian. Fondly remembered as the theme to Welcome Back, Kotter, it was still too early to know the extent of fame that John Travolta would see in his acting career. The nation was 200 years in, with technology advancing and political conflicts continuing. Those first 10 years of my life saw me living in two cities and attending two different elementary schools. I made my first communion, learned to love reading and some math, and enjoyed many great trips with family. That time also saw the start of Apple, continued Cold War tensions that included the Soviets invading Afghanistan, advancements in space exploration with Columbia launching as the first reusable shuttle, the start of MTV (I miss the 24/7 videos), and efforts like Live Aid where musicians led the way to raise awareness and money to help countries struggling with famine.

From a leadership development perspective, some of the most popular professional focused books in that decade included James Macgregor Burns’ Leadership, which highlighted transactional and transformational leadership and The One Minute Manager, Ken Blanchard and Spencer Johnson’s very popular book that shared techniques to boost productivity and empower employees. Leaders during that decade included three U.S. Presidents – Ford, Carter, and Reagan; four Soviet leaders including Leonoid Brezhnev and Mikhail Gorbachev; and the beginning of Margaret Thatcher’s 11-year journey as the first female Prime Minister of the UK. I really didn’t have any specific leadership opportunities that I recall from that young age, but they would certainly emerge as I started the next decade of my life.

1986-1995

When I turned 10, we were getting closer to the end of the Cold War. Robert Palmer’s “Addicted to Love” was the number one song on the radio, and Top Gun was the top grossing movie of 1986. The time went by quickly as I grew to love music and was involved in band, choir, and theatre during many of those years. I went on some amazing band trips which included Saint Louis, Virginia Beach, and Chicago. I sang in multiple choir concerts and competitions and had a role behind the scenes or on stage for two plays and three musicals. I also managed to visit Washington, D.C. three times in that decade. First for our eighth-grade trip, two years later on a band trip, and two years after that at a high school journalism conference. I graduated from high school during this decade of life and started my first year of college. While I did not fare well my freshman year, I gained some valuable lessons that took me to an improved academic experience at other schools in future years. Two tragedies marked the beginning of this decade with the Challenger explosion and the Chernobyl incident. There was also the controversial discovery that became known as the Iran-Contra Affair. The second decade of my life saw the fall of the Berlin Wall along with the reunification of Germany and the end of the USSR, the launch of the World Wide Web, the Gulf War, the Oklahoma City bombing, the O.J. car chase and trial, the rise of grunge music, the death of Kurt Cobain, and the beginnings of the Foo Fighters (some of you knew I was going to find a way to mention them!).

While I was navigating all levels of school from elementary to my first year of college, there was a lot of buzz from a leadership development perspective. Mentioned in my last post, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (which I now own thanks to a friend’s generous birthday gift!) was published within those ten years along with Tony Robbins’ Awaken the Giant Within and Unlimited Power which center on controlling thoughts and emotions as well as developing peak performance. Leaders during that decade included Reagan and two more U.S. Presidents – George H.W. Bush and Bill Clinton; the end of Mikhail Gorbachev’s leading of Russia followed by Boris Yeltsin; and the conclusion of Margaret Thatcher’s role as Prime Minister followed by John Major. In the second half of this decade, I began to find ways to lead. I oversaw our high school band uniform coordination, making sure inventory was updated and that each band member had the right sizes and pieces for marching band. I also had the chance to coordinate volunteers for our school’s blood drive, a small thing that helped lay the foundation for another volunteer leader opportunity later in life.  

I will continue the decades in my next post as I reflect on these past 50 years both personally, professionally, and historically. What are things you recall that shaped you over the decades of your life? I’d love to learn about them! Feel free to share in the comments.

Habits – make them or break them!

It’s time for another question! This time, the focus is on habits.

What habit, if you did it more consistently, would have a positive effect on your life?

Habits are something that we hear about all the time. There are articles and advice everywhere about the importance of developing good habits as well as how to stop following bad habits. James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, emphasizes the importance of incremental methods to establish positive habits and remove negative ones. Charles Duhigg, author of The Power of Habit, shares research and stories of why habits even exist and how this knowledge will make a difference in what we do.

For me, there are habits that already have a positive effect on my life. One that I’ve shared before is keeping journals. The gratitude journal as some of you know is one where every night before bed, I write down five successes and three things I am thankful for from that day. I do my best not to repeat, but at times it does happen as it may be something that’s tied to a specific goal. I also have a second journal, One Question a Day: A Five-Year Journal, that allows me to answer questions each night and see if the answer changes year over year. Some questions are annually focused such as “What goal would you like to accomplish this year?”, while others may stay the same such as “What is your favorite restaurant?” I’ve had this journal just over two years and enjoy looking at past entries to see what answers have changed and which are identical. The habit of journalling has helped me keep a positive perspective, even on the hardest days, and take time to reflect on where I’m at in the moment.

Looking at habits that I would like to establish as a leader that have a positive effect tie back to Franklin Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. First, I have realized that I need to read this book as it includes critical areas that will bring improvement to my personal and professional life. Reviewing the summary of the habits, I see where I demonstrate elements of each. At the same time, I would like to cultivate some areas to bring further growth. This includes using more proactive language, a deeper review of how I manage my time, and becoming more of an empathic listener. These can bring a positive and supportive approach to those you lead and help focus on the important things that help teams be successful in their purpose.

Habits are a way of life that we continue to make, break, and maintain throughout the years. They can help expand your horizons, make you healthier, or go in the opposite direction and set you back in your goals. Take some time to reflect and ask yourself:

  • Which habits are serving me well that I should maintain or cultivate?
  • Which habits are holding me back from my personal and professional goals? What is needed to break these habits?
  • Which habits do I want to form to help me grow personally and professionally?

What did you discover? Share in the comments!

Doing the impossible

I hope that the questions in the past posts have allowed you to reflect on your life journey and given you some new insights. On to the next question!

What was something that seemed impossible – but you did it anyway?

For most of us, we’ve had times in our life where we faced the decision to move forward with something we didn’t think we were capable of or thought would be an uphill battle to reach the finish line. At that moment, we could have decided that it was ok not to move in that direction. We had every right to do so. Instead we chose to slay the dragon, overcome the giant – whatever you want to call it – and do what it took to achieve that goal.

I recall a few of these moments. Some changed my perspective. Others taught me the importance of perseverance and resilience. Not all were major events. One instance was making a simple choice to stop eating food after 9 p.m. I had a habit of wanting just one more snack before bed, which is not a healthy practice. As I’ve been exploring ways to make better choices and lose weight, I saw repeatedly that late night eating has a significant impact on our metabolism. I made the decision to put this into practice at the first of the year. I was sure I’d cave and convince myself that I needed just one more thing to eat, and that hunger pangs would constantly taunt me. Even still, I put reminders on my phone and made a conscious effort to make 9 p.m. the cutoff point. I’m happy to share that I have only had one moment where I ate something past that time and overall have not had any major cravings. While it was a small decision, I know it will have positive effects on my overall health goals.

Another example is on a professional level. Recently, I needed to support the design of a microlearning course to address a learning gap. While I am skilled to lead an amazing team that produces quality training courses, I will be the first to admit that I am not a rockstar instructional designer. At the same time, I can create simple courses and navigate through key instructional design tools. I was nervous to take on this project but knew it was necessary to help reduce the errors that our core audience was making in a particular area. The pre-work was the easier part, identifying the objectives and creating the storyboard and script for the lesson. Once I completed that and received approval from stakeholders and subject matter experts, I started the challenging part for me – using the design software. It was a combination of Vyond and Adobe Captivate, two tools that I was familiar with. I consider myself to be between an advanced beginner and competent user, having created videos in the past. I began putting the work together then asked my employee, who uses the tool regularly, for guidance on complex tasks. He was happy to help and gave honest feedback that helped me make key revisions and learn new ways to use Vyond. This led to a successfully designed course that was published on training site for our learning audience to access.

These two examples helped strengthen my leadership skills. How? First, making healthier choices brings me the energy I need to lead. If I’m fatigued or am dealing with health conditions that take me away from work, I risk not being an effective leader. In the second example, I was willing to jump in and ask for help to ensure I was supporting the needs of our team. Leaders should not be afraid to ask others, including their own team members, for their expertise to help them with decisions or key tasks. Your employees can be critical resources that help you build stronger teams. With that in mind, there’s no shame in leaders to ask their employees for support. What are things that seemed impossible for you, but you moved forward in completing the task or goal? Share in the comments!

Energy Givers and Drainers

We’re on to the next of the reflection questions I’ve been sharing.

What gives you energy – and what drains it? This has been a discovery over time that continues to help me find balance not only as a leader, but in all aspects of life. I’ve found for myself that some of my energy givers and drainers have slight similarities and have factors that are key to when certain things bring energy and when they take it away.

One area has to do with interactions with others. When I am involved in small group and one on one conversations, I gain energy during the interaction. I enjoy learning about others and hearing their experiences and insights on various topics. When it’s all done, I have to regroup and reenergize. At the same time, being in large groups and engaging in crowd events will quickly drain energy from me (unless it’s a Foo Fighters concert – that’s one of the rare times I find a balance of energy!). I’ve learned to focus much of my time on smaller interactions. When I am in larger groups, I prepare for the experience then decompress at home as soon as I can!

Learning also brings me a lot of energy. I am truly a learning nerd, always looking for new topics and experiences that bring growth. Whether it’s discovering a new recipe, watching a video on nutrition, looking up steps to use a particular software program, reading an insightful book, or exploring a variety of subjects, I come out excited and encouraged about what I have learned.

On the other hand, an area that is known to drain energy in my world is struggling with change. While able to adapt to change in many scenarios, there are times when I am hesitant to move forward with something new. If faced with a situation that I do not have experience with or feel that there’s not a reason to change because the current circumstances are working fine, my stubborn Taurus nature may flare up and I may first dig my heels in the ground. When this happens, I become exhausted fighting to keep things the way that they are while knowing the change is beneficial to my life. This has occurred in personal, professional, family, and other areas. How have I handled this? In many cases, I take the time to pause and review the whole picture related to the change. From there, as a friend and coworker recently coined, I become comfortable with being uncomfortable. When I take this approach, it may not always be easy but at the same time I persevere and keep moving in the direction necessary to navigate through that change.

Coming to learn some of these contributors to gaining or losing energy, I’ve realized an important lesson. Being intentional to invest my time in the energy givers and being mindful when energy drainers are creeping into my life allows me to change course and point myself back to what energizes me. Where do you find you gain the most energy? What tries to take that energy away from you? Share in the comments!