Energy Givers and Drainers

We’re on to the next of the reflection questions I’ve been sharing.

What gives you energy – and what drains it? This has been a discovery over time that continues to help me find balance not only as a leader, but in all aspects of life. I’ve found for myself that some of my energy givers and drainers have slight similarities and have factors that are key to when certain things bring energy and when they take it away.

One area has to do with interactions with others. When I am involved in small group and one on one conversations, I gain energy during the interaction. I enjoy learning about others and hearing their experiences and insights on various topics. When it’s all done, I have to regroup and reenergize. At the same time, being in large groups and engaging in crowd events will quickly drain energy from me (unless it’s a Foo Fighters concert – that’s one of the rare times I find a balance of energy!). I’ve learned to focus much of my time on smaller interactions. When I am in larger groups, I prepare for the experience then decompress at home as soon as I can!

Learning also brings me a lot of energy. I am truly a learning nerd, always looking for new topics and experiences that bring growth. Whether it’s discovering a new recipe, watching a video on nutrition, looking up steps to use a particular software program, reading an insightful book, or exploring a variety of subjects, I come out excited and encouraged about what I have learned.

On the other hand, an area that is known to drain energy in my world is struggling with change. While able to adapt to change in many scenarios, there are times when I am hesitant to move forward with something new. If faced with a situation that I do not have experience with or feel that there’s not a reason to change because the current circumstances are working fine, my stubborn Taurus nature may flare up and I may first dig my heels in the ground. When this happens, I become exhausted fighting to keep things the way that they are while knowing the change is beneficial to my life. This has occurred in personal, professional, family, and other areas. How have I handled this? In many cases, I take the time to pause and review the whole picture related to the change. From there, as a friend and coworker recently coined, I become comfortable with being uncomfortable. When I take this approach, it may not always be easy but at the same time I persevere and keep moving in the direction necessary to navigate through that change.

Coming to learn some of these contributors to gaining or losing energy, I’ve realized an important lesson. Being intentional to invest my time in the energy givers and being mindful when energy drainers are creeping into my life allows me to change course and point myself back to what energizes me. Where do you find you gain the most energy? What tries to take that energy away from you? Share in the comments!

Looking back 14 years – part 3

Over the last few posts, I’ve been reflecting on the lessons learned over my 14-year career at the company I currently work at. I’m wrapping up that series today by sharing with you the last two that have made a difference and helped me continue down the path of growth as a leader and all-around as a person.

  1. Be willing to take risks
    • If you needed a spokesperson for being risk adverse, I’d probably be at the top of the list. Over the years, I’ve learned that risk is necessary for growth. Some of the biggest risks I have taken led to new doors and successes that I never would have known if I had avoided the risk. This included entering a doctoral program where statistics was not my forte. I was grateful for a professor that took the time and provided tools and videos to help us through analyzing quantitative data. This was a key factor in being able to successfully perform quantitative research as part of my dissertation. When I first became a manager at my company, I moved to an area that I was not as familiar with. Not only was I being stretched as a new leader and the responsibilities it entailed, but I was also being stretched to better understand the audience I was tasked with developing training for. I implemented tactics I had used on other training teams to learn about the audience and worked with stakeholders to uncover their learning needs. These are just a few examples, but ones where had I decided the risk was not worth it, I would not be where I am at in my career journey.
  2. Never stop learning
    • Those that know me shouldn’t be surprised that this is on the list. As a learning nerd, I am always looking for new knowledge. Whether it’s reading a book, watching a video, engaging in a conversation, or taking some sort of class, I crave the chance to learn more every day. There are many quotes out there that reference the importance of learning. One of my favorites is from Jack Nicholson, who said “The minute you’re not learning I believe you’re dead.” A bit dark, but he’s right. Learning should encompass every moment of our lives. In the last year, here are some things I’ve learned:
      • How to use SecureGPT
      • How to create scene changes in a video software we use for learning
      • My son is amazing at math – he most likely gets that from his dad!
      • Having mentors is important
      • Adversity is inevitable – it’s how you respond to it that determines what happens next

I hope that the lessons shared were insightful and helped you reflect on your own career journey. In the next post, I’ll share how I’ve identified goals for 2026 and new ways I’m holding myself accountable. I’d still like to hear the reflections from your journey. Share in the comments!

Leadership lessons all around us

I’m changing gears and sharing something that was an a-ha moment for me last week. I will get back to more on balance in a future post.

During a conversation with one of my mentors, she shared a leadership lesson she encountered while on vacation. It was a special nugget that gave her some perspective on things she would like to do differently as a leader. When I heard the story, it gave me things to consider. But that’s not the point that I’m sharing today.

All around us, there are stories waiting to be revealed. Lessons in the ordinary that want to teach us about leadership and are not part of our day-to-day work. In my master’s program, I took a Team Development course. One of the group projects was to analyze a television show and identify the leadership dynamics of the characters. My group selected the show “Bones,” the 2005-2017 drama series featuring the adventures of forensic anthropologist Dr. Temperence Brennan and FBI Special Agent Seely Booth as they investigated potential murders. Watching select episodes, we identified team dynamics and how the two interacted with each other and members of the forensics team. These stories, while fictional, offered comparisons of best practices and things to avoid when working with a team. This is one of many examples where television and movies can teach us about leadership, working in teams, and other important life lessons.

Nature can also teach us leadership. In the brief inspirational video, “Wisdom of Wolves: Leadership Lessons from Nature” by Simple Truths, quotes and reflective statements uncover how observations of wolves and their packs demonstrate patience, communication, and loyalty along with other characteristics that are key to leading others. The insights on communication stood out strongest to me. Just as wolves use different forms of communication among their packs to be successful, humans also have various communication methods that can be strategically used to ensure teams and individuals adequately receive information and direction to successfully complete tasks and contribute to the bigger picture of team and company goals.     

Sports is another area where some often draw leadership examples from. One of my favorite quotes is Wayne Gretzky’s “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” I’ve applied this in sales training and in my own professional development. From a sales perspective, the quote can motivate salespeople to take every opportunity to close a sale. From a professional development perspective, this quote has challenged me to look at new opportunities to grow through stretch opportunities and leadership challenges. If I don’t, I may not get that shot that could help me get to the next level of my career journey. Where have you found leadership lessons in the ordinary? How have they made a difference in your personal and professional development? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!